To friends and family who may be concerned (or annoyed) by what seems to be an inordinate obsession with the Zombie Apocalypse, this note is for you.
Mornings are the most difficult for me.
Each day I wake up feeling like someone left a brick wall over me the night before.
Getting up on a daily basis proves to be an ordeal which requires careful consideration and an extra amount of willpower. The chronic pain that is part and parcel of having Lupus has not been the greatest party on earth –
if I could just wake feeling no pain whatsoever, then it would be a near miraculous morning.
One learns to live with the discomfort, but there are days when it just feels too challenging to simply sit up – good thing I don’t sleep soundly and wake up early, it gives me time to stare at the ceiling long enough to convince myself that moving my arms or stretching might be a good idea before I actually need to be up and out of bed.
There is a part of me that knows there will be NO Zombie Apocalypse – that I am more likely to perish from a stroke, heart or kidney failure than battling the undead with an appetite for human flesh and brain. The other voices in my head however, raise a ruckus and goad me to get moving and stretch my sore muscles just in case zombies do invade the country. One never knows, right? So I give in to the other voices for good measure.
The belief that I will actually be physically ready to deal with the Zombie Apocalypse is a dream that I nourish, coupled with a realistic assessment of my physical fitness (or lack thereof) as I figure out what weapon or mode of escape I can best make use of during the onslaught. I practice brandishing my cane like a baseball bat but realize it might be too flimsy to be any good, I keep at it anyway.
It gives me a purpose for getting up and out of bed and stretching the pain away from my body. I also have to get up to make sure that the dog gets his breakfast, but that is a different story. ;-)
In the midst of my fixation with this impending catastrophe, I still remember to look both ways before crossing the street or make sure I watch my step as I make my way down a tricky path or staircase. How can I expect to wield a weapon and use it if I can barely make my way out of anywhere?
Since there are many mornings that the soreness I feel in my joints cause me to walk like a zombie, I might just get away with ‘blending in' with the throng – but this will only work if I douse myself with blood and innards so I will not smell suspiciously alive – not an option I would like to actually have to take. (I saw this on an episode of The Walking Dead and this plan would, quite literally go down the drain if it starts to rain because the downpour would just wash my disguise clean off me.) I obviously need a better plan!
In the meantime, as I fool myself into thinking I’ve got a fighting chance of surviving the Apocalypse, I scour the Internet for stories and tips on how best to deal with zombies. I post photos and signs on Facebook that alternately points out and makes fun of the belief that the Zombie Apocalypse is indeed almost upon us. I remind friends that we’ve got to prepare ourselves by sharing news reports and write ups that have to do with possible zombie attacks.
So yes, it seems silly to worry about it given the many other problems that the country – and the rest of the world – seem to be dealing with at present but this is MY reality and how I choose to motivate myself to get thru another day riddled with painful joints or intermittent dizzy spells is my choice.
I make plans to meet friends, watch a movie or take the puppy out for some fresh air, I still do what most sane and rational people do for recreation – but this need I have to prepare fastidiously for Zombies invading the country just won’t go away.
It’s probably just a phase, but for now, it works. I just have one request = Walang basagan ng trip.*
(*don’t ruin my fun)
Mabuhay!!!
Monday, June 4, 2012
Friday, February 17, 2012
Lessons Logan taught me...
When Logan wants something he will stop at nothing until he gets it.
With a single-mindedness of purpose he always attempts to run off with his favorite 'stolen treasures' - my spectacles, my mobile phone, a ballpen, a scrap of paper, a sheaf of tissue.
Dogged determination. I now understand why that term was coined.
Each time he takes something, he runs like he stole it (because really, he *did*)
When cornered and brought to account, knowing whatever is in his possession doesn't belong to him, he drops it like its hot.
Every chance he gets, he guns for the prize, giving his whole furry being into whatever purpose he's set out to fulfill at the moment. Whether he thinks he owns the item or just wants to play, he knows what he wants.
He is very consistent. His tactics may change, but his goal remains the same.
Impressive for an 8 month old puppy.
My dog manages to get the better of me sometimes and seems smarter than some people I know.
He will find a way to get what he wants, eventually - even when you think he has no hope of getting it. When he sees whatever his little heart desires, he'll bug you for it, keep at it, persevere till you finally give in out of sheer exasperation - or take it when you're not paying attention.
So pay attention.
As in life, it helps to know what you want. If you can set your sights right you go for whatever it is, even if sometimes the path to what you want isn't all too easy.
When you get what you want, run like it's stolen.
If you have something that doesn't really belong to you, drop it like its hot.
Pay attention, you will get your chance to try again.
When cornered, find a way to escape.
Repeat as necessary.
note: Logan also seems to know what things belong to him, and he always keeps them on his bed or retrieves it when he notices it is where it isn't supposed to be. Fascinating. The puppy is more organized than me!
With a single-mindedness of purpose he always attempts to run off with his favorite 'stolen treasures' - my spectacles, my mobile phone, a ballpen, a scrap of paper, a sheaf of tissue.
Dogged determination. I now understand why that term was coined.
Each time he takes something, he runs like he stole it (because really, he *did*)
When cornered and brought to account, knowing whatever is in his possession doesn't belong to him, he drops it like its hot.
Every chance he gets, he guns for the prize, giving his whole furry being into whatever purpose he's set out to fulfill at the moment. Whether he thinks he owns the item or just wants to play, he knows what he wants.
He is very consistent. His tactics may change, but his goal remains the same.
Impressive for an 8 month old puppy.
My dog manages to get the better of me sometimes and seems smarter than some people I know.
He will find a way to get what he wants, eventually - even when you think he has no hope of getting it. When he sees whatever his little heart desires, he'll bug you for it, keep at it, persevere till you finally give in out of sheer exasperation - or take it when you're not paying attention.
So pay attention.
As in life, it helps to know what you want. If you can set your sights right you go for whatever it is, even if sometimes the path to what you want isn't all too easy.
When you get what you want, run like it's stolen.
If you have something that doesn't really belong to you, drop it like its hot.
Pay attention, you will get your chance to try again.
When cornered, find a way to escape.
Repeat as necessary.
note: Logan also seems to know what things belong to him, and he always keeps them on his bed or retrieves it when he notices it is where it isn't supposed to be. Fascinating. The puppy is more organized than me!
Saturday, February 11, 2012
Reasons.
I woke up today.
Feeling every bit like I've been run over by a truck that lost its brakes, another day begins for me.
The pain I wake up to daily is something like a second skin, it is just - there.
Today is no different.
A reason to get up and out of bed is Logan staring up at me expectantly, waiting for me to fix his breakfast.
Must get moving.
I shuffle to the kitchen counter and fix a dish of dog food which is softened with water. I let it sit for a while. I make my coffee and brush my teeth while waiting for the coffeemaker to get done with my drink.
Another reason to keep moving is Logan wanting to play fetch.
He drops his ball at my feet and sits patiently while I slowly bend down to pick up the toy. *Throw*
He scurries off after the prize and runs back to me with the ball in his mouth.
*drops ball at my feet again*
I manage to toss the ball midway through the room where Logan zooms off after it.
I walk back to bed and slowly lie down again. I feel like death warmed over.
Logan jumps up on the bed, bounces off my legs and makes straight for my face.
A good reason to pull a pillow over my face to cover it.
Logan dives under the pillow to try to get a good nip at my ear.
A reason to roll to my side and snuggle deeper under the pillow.
I feel every movement like a scream and all the while I have a puppy waiting for me to give it a hug. I pick him up and cuddle the furry bundle of energy.
You don't notice pain as much when you have a little dog in your arms.
A quick time-check tells me the coffee should be done and Logan's breakfast should be ready as well.
I get up from bed as tediously as the first time and switch on the computer on my way back to the kitchen counter.
A reason to get up early is I don't need to rush too much before I begin work.
A reason to keep going is my coffee is ready and Logan's breakfast must be served.
I sit down at the computer, typing slowly and log in to begin my day's work.
A reason to work - buy more doughnuts, coffee and dog food.
I feel Logan lay down by my feet and drift off to sleep. I watch him settle into slumber like only a puppy can.
The pain I feel in every muscle where even my skin hurts is still there, but I've got a reason to get up today aside from work - there's a puppy named Logan expecting me to play when he wakes up from his nap.
For today, that is enough.
Feeling every bit like I've been run over by a truck that lost its brakes, another day begins for me.
The pain I wake up to daily is something like a second skin, it is just - there.
Today is no different.
A reason to get up and out of bed is Logan staring up at me expectantly, waiting for me to fix his breakfast.
Must get moving.
I shuffle to the kitchen counter and fix a dish of dog food which is softened with water. I let it sit for a while. I make my coffee and brush my teeth while waiting for the coffeemaker to get done with my drink.
Another reason to keep moving is Logan wanting to play fetch.
He drops his ball at my feet and sits patiently while I slowly bend down to pick up the toy. *Throw*
He scurries off after the prize and runs back to me with the ball in his mouth.
*drops ball at my feet again*
I manage to toss the ball midway through the room where Logan zooms off after it.
I walk back to bed and slowly lie down again. I feel like death warmed over.
Logan jumps up on the bed, bounces off my legs and makes straight for my face.
A good reason to pull a pillow over my face to cover it.
Logan dives under the pillow to try to get a good nip at my ear.
A reason to roll to my side and snuggle deeper under the pillow.
I feel every movement like a scream and all the while I have a puppy waiting for me to give it a hug. I pick him up and cuddle the furry bundle of energy.
You don't notice pain as much when you have a little dog in your arms.
A quick time-check tells me the coffee should be done and Logan's breakfast should be ready as well.
I get up from bed as tediously as the first time and switch on the computer on my way back to the kitchen counter.
A reason to get up early is I don't need to rush too much before I begin work.
A reason to keep going is my coffee is ready and Logan's breakfast must be served.
I sit down at the computer, typing slowly and log in to begin my day's work.
A reason to work - buy more doughnuts, coffee and dog food.
I feel Logan lay down by my feet and drift off to sleep. I watch him settle into slumber like only a puppy can.
The pain I feel in every muscle where even my skin hurts is still there, but I've got a reason to get up today aside from work - there's a puppy named Logan expecting me to play when he wakes up from his nap.
For today, that is enough.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Oh, that's right! It's 2012!
I have been remiss.
My last entry was the beginning of the fourth quarter of 2011 and since then, it appears that life has gotten in the way of my blogging habit.
ok. excuses, excuses.
I must say though, I've been doing my best to keep up with life and the demands that come with it. The fun, not so fun, stressful, exhilarating, awesome, sometimes dreary, often interminable, but always engaging experience of simply being alive.
I've also been kept busy by the demands of raising a persistent puppy - a Yorkshire Terrier named Logan. Many days I firmly believe he is actually a Monk-eroo (a cross between a monkey and a kangaroo) I don't ever recall Tiger (mom's 14, soon to be 15 year old Yorkie) being quite as playful. But my days are full.
I also, as of late, have not been feeling as tip-top as in the early parts of 2011. No cause for alarm, I suppose it is just the course of the dis-ease running right along with me.
2012 has been good so far, I have several things I'd like to share on my blog which we can hope I will get to posting soon.
I just need to dust off the cobwebs in my brain and get my act together.
New friends, new plans, new habits, new experiences.
It was an exciting end of the year and a most intriguing start for another chapter in life.
Life remains good, The Universe is still working things out in our favor (yes, believe it or not!) and I have every intention of having a fantastic year ahead.
Keep me company, it'll be fun!
Rock & Roll people,Rock & Roll!!!
Mabuhay!
My last entry was the beginning of the fourth quarter of 2011 and since then, it appears that life has gotten in the way of my blogging habit.
ok. excuses, excuses.
I must say though, I've been doing my best to keep up with life and the demands that come with it. The fun, not so fun, stressful, exhilarating, awesome, sometimes dreary, often interminable, but always engaging experience of simply being alive.
I've also been kept busy by the demands of raising a persistent puppy - a Yorkshire Terrier named Logan. Many days I firmly believe he is actually a Monk-eroo (a cross between a monkey and a kangaroo) I don't ever recall Tiger (mom's 14, soon to be 15 year old Yorkie) being quite as playful. But my days are full.
I also, as of late, have not been feeling as tip-top as in the early parts of 2011. No cause for alarm, I suppose it is just the course of the dis-ease running right along with me.
2012 has been good so far, I have several things I'd like to share on my blog which we can hope I will get to posting soon.
I just need to dust off the cobwebs in my brain and get my act together.
New friends, new plans, new habits, new experiences.
It was an exciting end of the year and a most intriguing start for another chapter in life.
Life remains good, The Universe is still working things out in our favor (yes, believe it or not!) and I have every intention of having a fantastic year ahead.
Keep me company, it'll be fun!
Rock & Roll people,Rock & Roll!!!
Mabuhay!
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